While many people go to clubs and events to meet potential partners and enjoy the venues for what they have to offer, others entertain or host at home. What’s not immediately clear is who is responsible for moving things forward into playing and what the basic etiquette is since it’s no ordinary party. Here are the things you should know before you host a home sex party.
Home Sex Party Explained
The short answer is you! In order for things to go smoothly and to get where you want it all to go, you need to be the driver. You are also responsible for making sure the guests know what’s expected and have everything they need for an enjoyable night. It’s really quite simple but even I have missed things or not taken my hostess responsibility on board and the night has dragged on, not getting to the play part as soon as it could have. This is particularly common with people who are new to the scene and hosting at their place.
Whether you are new to the scene or not, if your party is about sex and not food then I encourage you to host an after dinner party, with finger food provided. If you start the party at, say, 8pm, then people can have dinner before they arrive, but still have time to socialise and unwind before play time starts.
Tell your guests what time to arrive and what to bring (ie: their own toys and drinks), that way you don’t have to run the risk of not having a toy or drink that they enjoy, and since alcohol is a great way for most people to chill out in a new situation, them bringing it increases the chances of them relaxing and having a great night. Nibbles, condoms and lube should always be provided. Advertise it as BYO and NO DRUGS. The parties I go to require you to provide a recent face pic and ID that must be emailed to the Host. Nothing puts off people more than a crossdresser with a beard and they are out there ……..
Tell them what attire to wear, smart casual or sexy, or perhaps have a uniform party.
Let them know if there is a bed/room they can stay in if they choose to stay, because driving after alcohol and hours of physical activity (even of the enjoyable kind) can make people more susceptible to falling asleep at the wheel. Make an assessment at the end of the night and insist they stay if you feel they have a higher chance of being in an accident. This is being a responsible host. The parties I go to are not always at venue’s where people could stay. It is 2015 and people must be responsible for their own behaviour. This includes being able to drive after drinking etc.
This is your house and you set the tone of what’s acceptable and what’s not. If you want everyone to flirt, you need to be the one that starts it so that your guests know it’s ok. Start slow so you don’t scare them and watch for their reactions to guide you; if they flinch or move away, it’s clear they aren’t ready for that, if they respond and flirt back, green light!
The most professional hosts don’t play at all but are there to facilitate the night. There should be rooms or a place where people can socialise, eat nibbles, chat and watch porn. There should then be rooms that are set up for people to play. People will soon work out what they want to do.
During conversation find out what their boundaries are for the evening, so that you know what they are comfortable with and then share what yours are too. Oh and the usual etiquette applies here, steer clear of talking about religion and politics, apart from them being potentially highly volatile topics, they can also be quite boring and you don’t want to make your playmates mad or put them to sleep too early.
The only boundaries should be NO means NO. The people are all grown adults. Everything should be consensual between everyone involved. Make sure that you have provided enough tissues, condoms and lubricant for everyone and multiple rounds, you don’t want to have to cut play short because you’ve run out of condoms. They may bring their own but don’t assume they will. Nibbles, condoms and lube should always be provided, and a stash of towels in the bathroom should be available if people want to clean up before they leave.
Make sure the designated play area is clean, as well as the bathroom and toilet your guests will be using. There’s nothing worse than dirty toilets, smelly sheets and mouldy showers to kill the mood. Fresh sheets and cleanliness go a long way; trust me on this.
Now not everyone automatically knows this information before they host their own play night, so if you go to someone’s house and it’s clear they aren’t leading the night like they could, by all means step in and make suggestions because often everyone wants to get to play but no one is confident enough to make it happen! Above all else, relax and have fun no matter what the night eventuates into.